Have you heard the conspiracy theory that cats were sent by aliens to spy on us? I asked my cats about it and they had no comment, but then that it what you would expect from a creature who is actually spying on you! So, could it be true? Could it by that cats are spies sent by aliens?
Vice.com took a look at some of the arguments for the theory that cats are alien spies. They note that they took the list from a user named RedSpider on a UK tech message board called Digital Kaos where there are 8 points made to support that cats are alien spies!
The first one is that there is no documentation before ancient Egypt of cats and that cats were worshipped in ancient Egypt as gifts from the gods! This seems to suggest that cats did not exist before ancient Egypt and might not just be spies, but that cats are aliens themselves! When looking into this argument, I found an article on atlasobsura.com where they talk about the domestication of cats by Egyptians around 3,500 years ago. However, they also note that there was a 9,500 year old site in Cyprus where a cat was found buried with their human. That seems to be strong evidence that cats on Earth do predate the ancient Egyptians. Of course that doesn't mean cats aren't alien, but if cats are aliens, they arrived earlier than ancient Egypt.
The next argument is that science can not explain a cats purr. The note on Digital Kaos goes on to say "Feedback much", seeming to hint that a cats purr might be a hum caused by feedback of an audio transmitter, like if you have your phone too close to speakers. I had researched a cat's purr early last year and found some interesting information about purring, including that cats purr at a frequency conducive to healing and that the sound is created by a vibration of the vocal cords. As far as I've seen, cats purr without the help of any alien technology, though it might be intersting to think that aliens sent cats as healers with their perfectly pitched purrs!
The 3rd point made in favor of the theory that cats are aliens is that they have a simliar look to the classic "grey" alien, with big almond shaped eyes, along with a small mouth and nose. This may be true, but I also think my cat Sophie looks similar to an arctic snow fox, with her white fur, but that doesn't mean they are actually related!
The next point in the theory that cats are alien spies is that they can see better than humans, and must therefore be more evolutionary advanced. However, as the Vice article points out, a cat's vision is different from us, but not necessarily better. Cats can see better in low light, but humans can see a wider range of colors. Cats are predators that hunt small prey often at dawn and dusk, so their better vision in low light is a great adaptation for them, but doesn't make them more evolutionary advanced than us or mean that some alien technology is at work.
Next, RedSpider asks if you've ever noticed your cat bolting into another room, and , suggests that when this happens they must be alone because they are receiving a transmission from the mothership. Now this might be worth looking into some more, but there are some reasons why a cat might bolt into another room, like they heard a noise or they just need some exercise after a nap. I suppose a cat might get the zoomies because they suddenly need to communicate with their mothership, but that seems like a complicated answer for common cat behavior.
The next argument that cats are alien spies is that everything that comes out of them is unnatural. I for one have seen a lot of cat poop, pee, puke and hairballs, but it all seems pretty natural to me. If my cat started cleaning up their own litterbox, I might find that to be otherworldly (and delightful), but until then, this doesn't seem to be a very strong argument that cats are alien!
The 7th point in the theory is that cats have anti-gravity properties that can help them survive when earthbound animals would die, like surviving a fall from a 4th story window. And the truth of this is that cats are apex predators, which makes them extremely agile. They can turn their spines and bodies in ways that seem to break the laws of physics, but they actually don't! Cats that land on their feet do so because they instinctively know how to turn their bodies to rotate themselves to land on their feet. As I mentioned before, cats are predators, and this is part of their adaptation to be able to pounce on unsuspecting prey, even from some pretty impressive heights!
There is one more point in the cats are alien spies theory, and that is that if you die, your cat would eat you. The author even admits that this is not a link between cats and aliens, but thinks it is creepy nonetheless. The Vice article mentions that this does seem to be true - afterall, if my husband and I died, my cats might have no other choice to keep themselves fed once they finish what is in their bowl - but they also link to this Slate article that offers several examples of dogs eating their owners as well. So, a pet eating their owner might be creepy, but not limited to cats and certainly not evidence that cats are aliens!
What do you think? I would need to see something a lot more convincing before starting wearing a tinfoil hat around my cat, but it's still fun to think I might have a furry, cuddly extraterrestial spy under my roof!
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